Homily to theASCENT participants at Brentwood for the 31st Sunday of Year C.
When I first became aware of news and politics – we’re talking 40 years ago – it seemed that if a politician resigned in disgrace, he – it was usually a he – disappeared from public life and wasn’t heard of again.
About 20 years ago, it felt like things had shifted. Now a politician who had resigned in disgrace might be re-appointed to a senior position a couple of years later.
And now? I can think of one politician who, having resigned in disgrace, got the very same job back within a week!
So I want to ask you a question: should politicians be given second chances?
Yes?
No?
It depends…
I think it depends. It seems that these days, getting found out by the media is a public disgrace and your resignation or dismissal is a slap on the wrist. Then because you’ve had your punishment, you can come back. I’m not sure that’s OK. It’s like being sin-binned in a sports match, which is factored into the tactics of the game.
But what if the person is genuinely sorry and is willing to learn from their mistake? Would I rather have a public official who’s made a mistake, owned up, and is sincerely trying to do batter, or a new replacement who hasn’t yet fouled up in public?
There’s a danger we treat the confessional the same way. We endure the shame of outing our sins to a priest – embarrassing or what? – and we get absolution. Then we’re out of the sin bin and back on the field of play, ready to foul up again. But if we do confession the right way, we’re not just confessing our sins – the Church says we also need a firm purpose of amendment.
What’s that? In simple language, it means I’ve decided to do things differently. And the proof I really have made that decision is that I can actually tell you how!
Take Zacchaeus. As a Jewish tax collector collaborating with the Roman authorities, he was something between a mob enforcer and a bailiff for Government debts. He was a pariah – not a piraña though just as dangerous – a pariah. Toxic. But not too toxic for Jesus.
The outsider finds himself inside, and in the emotion of the moment he makes a big promise. He would not only pay back anyone he’d cheated but also give generously to the poor. Did he do it? The Bible doesn’t tell us – but we do know Jesus took him at his word.
In that moment, Zacchaeus had a firm purpose of amendment. He had a plan for what he was going to do. As disciples of Jesus, we need to do the same. I’ve been a priest hearing confessions for more than 15 years now, so I want to share with you some help to do things differently to address three of the most common sins I hear.
PRAYER
First, what to do if you know you’re not faithful to prayer? Let me introduce you to the 4 Ps.
Plan to pray. If you don’t, you won’t.
Prioritise prayer. If you don’t pray first, you won’t pray.
Progress your prayer life. Don’t be over ambitious. Start with a short time of prayer and build up over time to doing more each day.
Partner with someone – someone you can meet with to pray, or a friend to hold you accountable.
ANGER
Next, what should you do if you find yourself getting angry with people?
There are two ways forward here. The first is if you’re getting angry with other people’s behaviour. Is it possible to get them to change?
One wrong way about it is to get in a shouting match when you’re in the heat of your anger.
Another wrong way is to bluntly tell them what you want them to do differently. Do that often enough and it’s called nagging!
So what can you do? In Sion Community, our members learn about something called Brave Communication.
What does that mean? It means, if someone’s behaviour is driving you mad, you wait until there’s a calm, quiet moment between the two of you and then ask if you can share something with them. Then say “I feel like this when you do that.” If the other person cares about you, they’ll want to change. But they need to find the right way to change.
Do you like being nagged?
Do you find it easy to change your own bad habits?
No? So be gentle when you’re waiting for someone else to change theirs.
But sometimes we get angry about other things, where a conversation with someone won’t change the problem. In these cases we might need to look at anger management. You can search online for help, but make sure you find a trustworthy site. The NHS has one – or if you don’t want to trust a Government site, the American Mayo Clinic also has great resources online, as does the mental health charity, Mind.
IMPURITY
Finally, what can you do if your main problem is that you keep looking at impure things?
First of all, although that’s embarrassing, know you’re not alone. There’s a really useful website out there, run by Christians, called the Naked Truth Project. Earlier this year they held a conference for church leaders. 24% of the people taking part had viewed impure images in the past month – that’s church leaders. Being a mature follower of Jesus doesn’t mean you’re free from the struggle against lust. That doesn’t mean it’s OK. But it does mean your sins of impurity haven’t made you the worst, unreformable, Christian in the church.
When you get caught into impurity, it’s easy to fall into one of two traps. One trap is to say “I’ve sinned so I’ll just carry on being impure.” The other trap is to despair and say “I’m the worst Christian, I deserve shame and condemnation.” No, avoid both traps. Instead of going down the path of sin or self-condemnation, kick out the thought. You might even say to yourself out loud, “That’s not who I am. That’s not what I choose to think.” Whatever impurity is playing on your mind, you don’t have to be defined by those. At times you may have to kick out those thoughts 10 times in the course of five minutes. That’s OK. Keep kicking!
Naked Truth offer two resources worth knowing about.
One is a free online course of five video-based sessions, called CTRL ALT DELETE. Anyone with an internet link can watch these.
The other is the chance to take part in an online support group for 8 sessions with a facilitator and 6 people of the same sex struggling with similar issues – the project is called CLICK TO KICK. There’s no cost, though they hope you could make a £10 donation. But for legal reasons, they can only offer these groups to people aged 18 and over. I don’t have time to read out the testimonies of people who’ve found hope and freedom through the course, so you should check them out yourself!
Whatever sin we’re trying to deal with, if it’s a sin we keep falling back into time and again, we can feel like we’ve lost the right to be helped, because we’re unworthy of God’s forgiveness. And part of that is true. You are not worthy.
But that’s OK!
It’s not about worthiness. Zacchaeus wasn’t worthy of what Jesus did for him. That’s the whole point! Jesus reaches out to us in our unworthiness, because he loves us – and the stories of Jesus having dinner with tax collectors or stopping an adulteress from being stoned are there precisely to remind us it’s not about us – it’s about Him.
We’re not alone. I want to leave you with the prayer that St Paul, with his companions Silas and Timothy, prayed for the new Christians in Thessaloniki:
God chose you, and we keep praying that God will make you worthy of being his people. We pray for God’s power to help you do all the good things you hope to do and your faith makes you want to do. Then, because of the undeserved grace of God and our Lord Jesus Christ, you will bring honor to the name of our Lord Jesus, and he will bring honour to you.
2 Thess 1:11-12 CEV
We may or may not give a second chance to our politicians, but Jesus will always offer a second chance to you. All you have to do is choose to change!